Starfinder:Adventure Log/2017-12-22

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Doing it

  • We arrive in Rayovek station
    • HappyCo HQ, lots of other horrifying shit on other floors
    • Office workers on the west have some kind of spell on them
    • Scientists on the right are chained to the floor. Ash outside their room.
    • Brunch is being served at the HappyMall soon
  • Lucielle is 28 in "human years" and like 180+ in whatever she thinks a year is natively
  • Mr Happy orders Absalom Station attendant disintegrated because he didn't get our flavour data
    • We all say day-old Capari sun
  • Mr Happy seems to be an android
  • Lucielle brings us "tofinkle" as a refreshment
    • Gowena pours it on the floor & prays to spinach lord
    • Tofinkle is a pink frozen confection - missing texture pink
    • HappyCo empire is built on blood, sweat, ash of disintegrated enemies, and tofinkle
    • Tofinkle is their flagship product
  • Voluminaus F. Happy gives us all 2000 credits to Carry Out His Will Across The Universe
  • Assignment: return to Absalom. Thungs found something Mr Happy wants, and he's sending us to get it back.
  • Mr Happy founded company 257 years ago
    • 1st product was Tofinkle, took off
    • Astronautics, then prisons, them theme parks
    • Combined prisons & theme parks
    • Potentially expanding into piano ties
  • Building the Grinstar, big pink happy space station
  • Ambazzamezidors
  • First ever Love-class explorer produced
    • Plasma torpedo & particle beam, good manuverability, above-average drift engine, expansion decks
    • Autodoors
    • Red button on science officer computer teleports us back directly to HappyCo HQ
      • If you hit it too often, the ship explodes.
    • IT HAS A BAR
      • A few spirits - Dr. Happy's brand (ex: fizzy-popping absinthe)
  • Mr Happy finished ship tour & vanishes in a puff of confetti
  • Manual: Robot #0 reads manual - Tyr-no, his duty to assist us
    • Robot will spy on us for Mr Happy
    • Can also open a line of communication to Mr Happy
  • Our task:
    • Mining ship found outside of Absalom, abandoned
    • Towing something very important to Mr Happy
  • Big red button on pilot's console
    • BIG RED BUTTON to teleport in and out of HappyCo's reality (not drift, something else)
    • Can be used once a week, with Mr Happy's approval
  • Tyr-no can manufacture Tofinkle
    • Shit out spinach-flavoured tofinkle from his butt
  • Jump to ~2 hours out from Absalom
    • Spot the mining ship w/ asteroid attached via tow cable
    • Asteroid is weird
  • Small ship comes in fast & locks on to us
    • Gowena plays a song & makes us put tofinkle on the floor before combat
    • Enemy craft is an Eoxian interceptor w/ 1 pilot
    • Craft tries to EMP our engines, but fails critically and EMPs its own engines. lawl.
    • Their engines are now glitching
    • It had an escape pod; it ejects and moves rapidly towards the mining ship
    • They outrun us and the pod makes it to the asteroid first
  • Mining ship is very used, paint is faded from radiation
    • We pick up a transpoder code: "Ship is the Acrion, under quarantine by order of Absalmon Station Security"
    • Asteroid is nondescript, we do pick up traces of magic
  • We EVA and board the mining ship
    • I grab Tyr-no and bring him with us -- he'll monitor local space w/ ship's sensors
    • Hand-to-butt human centipede before disembarking
  • Creepy dog monsters attack us on board
    • Gowena's big black dildo is now a big pink dildo to be HappyCo themed.
    • Fire doesn't hurt them?
    • It's an Akatta, an aberration that lives in the void
      • They hibernate & mimic minerals
      • Watery things when they wake up
    • Junk gets bitten and feels weird
    • Zith has Tyr-no shit Salt-Flavoured Tofinkle, loads it into dart, fires. It has trace amounts of salt, which disintegrates the akatta.
    • Tyr-no running low on tofinkle paste
    • Sniksnak executes the remaining akatta
  • Volkas finds a shotgun
    • Arc emitter for stunning at close range
    • 2h weapon
  • We find a dead goblin outside the core room -- core room had signs of a big battle
  • Another akatta
    • Volkas trips in some tofinkle Gowena tried to throw at the akatta
    • Gowena tries to help him up
      • "i dont know how i can help him"
      • "HOW MANY ARMS DO YOU HAVE, GIVE ME A HAND"
    • Junk murders it brutally
  • We figure out that the bite Junk got earlier infected him with a horrifying parasitic young version of an akatta that will eventually move to his brain and take over him.
    • He will have to make some saves over time to un-disease it
  • Found some loot in a storage room
    • Disruptive Infusion Seal
      • Applied to weapons, not sure what it does
      • Vulkas doesn't know what does either
    • Two Serum of Healing MK 1 (1d8)
    • 3 Med Patches
  • Found two goblins barricaded in a room
    • Telepathic message at them resulted in them shooting at their door
    • They shout about 'something got to me'
  • Theo suggests the dead goblin we found before might have a parasite in it that will reanimate the corpse
    • We inspect the corpse. He shot his own hand off and then killed himself?
  • Zith calms the goblins down and they stop being dicks.
    • They want to help us escape now
    • They were just in the area looking for stuff to raid, found derelict
    • They have not seen any eoxians
  • Gave Zith the three medpatches
  • We try to hack Tyr-no. He says if we try again, he'll self-destruct.
  • Per Tyr-no, we don't need the asteroid; we need what is IN the asteroid.
    • He won't tell us what's in it...
    • Eoxian dude might be there already :/

Homework

  • Remember to fix Junk's disease
  • Find the kicthen for salt?
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