Starfinder:Adventure Log/2019-05-03
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Doing It
- Theo books it to a bar
- Billy harasses a woman in the green park-y area
- "Have I got an exciting product for you -- my penis! It's covered in mayo!"
- She asks him to go away & threatens to call security
- Next up on offer, The Mayostick for 19.99
- She is a gardener (probably staff @ Elysium)
- Billy tries to sell her mayo to help the plants grow
- Billy squirts mayo on the plants before fleeing
- Volkas does some spoogling on Billy Maise
- Travelling mayo salesman, made a commercial out of nowhere for the Mayon, it went viral
- Now he makes commercials & is famous for it
- Incident where he beat a Barothen hooker & it hurt his rep
- MayoGlide MAXXX(TM) was the hail-mary that saved his brand
- IT HAS 3 Xes INSTEAD OF 2
- Popo follows Filip
- Corners him in an elevator
- Wants foot facial ;)
- Filip says OK & leads Popo to a spa
- Filip isn't doing the facial tho
- Popo wants to join him in his office ~.^
- Offers to chat tomorrow
- Popo counteroffers: no chat, just foot facial
- Gives in, will provide a feet facial tomorrow
- Popo calls Theo and has him write up a contract so Filip MUST do the feet facial tomorrow
- H4NZ works on rebuilding his drone!
- Keys sends him to a workroom
- Bruce bitches at him for showing up in "his" lab
- DON'T EAT MY CHEESE DOODLES.
- H4NZ mostly ignores him
- Billy finds a drunk woman in a bar
- "I would like to sneak some mayo into her drink"
- Oh god its 'special mayo'
- "What's so special about it?"
- "It came from me!" "I made it! WITH DRUGS!"
- Another woman joins
- "Want to come back to our quarters?"
- Sense motive 11, "You sense you're gunna be spreadin' mayo tonight Billy"
- "I have a roll of ion tape!"
- Buzzblade Vesk comes to visit Volkas
- She offers Volkas some haluciongenic snails
- They trip balls together
- Resort changes the pattern of the ceiling? Or are they just on drugs?
- His trip brings him back to the bad trip he had on Absalom after ... misreading a book so hard he became a Golarian cultist?
- Namedrops Mr. Happy as a Golarion, she doesn't know of him
- Remembers Scooter, Hero.
- Theo sees two more folks sipping drinks
- Nervous lady
- Ignorres them, orders a cigar
- Indigo introduces herself, is very ... excitable
- She's Romi's bodyguard
- Romi is a software mogul, made Keys app
- Romi is introvert? Indigo wants him to make friends
- Theo is not into it
- Popo gets into a robe & slippers
- Explores 2nd floor more
- Finds H4NZ and tells him about the robes
- Bruce gets mad and turns his radio way up
- is listening to a "radio personality" who is pro-MAAA
- Popo can't track Filip on the app, asks a security guard wtf
- Guard tells him to visit IT
- Bruce the fat guy is IT
- People in restricted areas (staff areas mostly) are not trackable, Filip will show up when he comes back out
- "Any other areas that are restricted?" "NOTHING I CAN TELL YOU ABOUT."
- Asks H4NZ if he knows how to get into the restricted areas
- Maybe later.
- H4NZ' app plays an advertisement unprompted.
- Tofinkle tofinkle, all you need is a little sprinkle. -> a bunch more hostility too
- H4NZ is annoyed and goes to his room & takes a long nap
- Theo has been sitting around and watching Romi
- Romi is inspecting the app, hm?
- Just hanging out, much like Theo
- He seems unimpressed by the resort
- Theo goes and gets spa'd
- Billy has gone up to the ladies' room ~.^
- Has a WILD NIGHT
- They agree to weird mayonaise-based requests
- "That happens."
- "Billy Naise here! I truly am the Mayo King! Now don't go telling people, or else! ~.^"
- Leaves a used tub of mayo :-)
- Noon the next day . . .
- Filip calls the whole party to thank us for helping out w/ the pirates!
- As a reward, we get their gear! Just have to head to the docking bay.
- Sentinel 3 is holding the captives in the brig, will be picked up by the Stewards.
- @Popo: asks when to meet, Popo says "RIGHT NOW" ~.^
- Theo, Volkas, & Naise go to the dock
- Naise tries to sell them MayoGlide maxxx to escape the cell
- Prisoners are not into it
- "MayoGlide MAXXX also doubles as beer!" -- bluff 31 lols
- They believe & ask for some
- Guard says no, don't give them stuff, doesn't know wtf mayoglide maxxx is
- "Guess it can't hurt, w/e"
- Pirates guzzles the mayo & is DISGUSTED.
- Naise hits on the female prisoner
- Theo asks about the whole "plane of untouched sorrows" thing, prisoners won't talk
- Theo asks Billy to get the guards to talk a walk, he succeeds!
- Theo & Volkas are alone w/ prisoners
- Caenan won't answer, Theo fucks up the other one w/ magic
- Years ago, weird mine on asteroid w/ a gas station front/
- Pirates kept coming to see what's what, people would go in and never come out
- 20 years ago something bad happened, Kozkota the Locust sent a signal out
- Some shit about ghosts and living shadows
- The asteroid mine was THIS asteroid, that the resort is built on
- Doesn't have firsthand knowledge
- Caenan upset that we won't heal his friend that Theo arcing surge'd
- Theo does not care and leaves as the guards return // "Must have tripped"
- Spoogle search -- "Asteroid Anecdote" blog
- Confirms portions of the story, identifies asteroid
- Mine wad abandoned by Oilreka (company?) that abandoned it
- 293 Eclipse Innovations something bought the asteroid, sold to Verkera Holdings till 311
- Eclipse owns Verkera Holdings
- Something shady about Eclipse Holdings?
- Probably trying to dis-associate their name w/ the asteroid's bad rep
- Something less-than-legal probably happened here
- Then Paradise Resorts bought it and built New Elysium!
- H4NZ works on his drone!
- Popo is geetting the foot facial from Filip
- NO TALKING
- Vigoriously works Popo's feet
- 20 minutes of massage, and then it's over
- Popo: that wasn't enough :-( Popo wants more!
- 10 more minutes.
- Popo leaves Filip a good review in Keys -- a solid 4!
- He goes back to his office
- Volkas rents a bike
- Ad plays on Volkas' app
- MUCHO GUSTO. Volkas is in the ad? he scoops beans?
- Billy Naise meets Bono K. Rono & Lana Rono
- Bono wants to know more !
- Naise drops mayo on the floor "yes this has happened to me"
- The Mayonge! It's an absorbing mayo sponge stick! Suck it up & squeeze the mayo back out!
- Bono K. Rono buys the Mayonge for 5000c
- Has a secret service agent clean up the mayo on the floor for him
- Billy approaches a Buzzblade, Zidhil
- Not into Naise's bullshit
- Smashes mayo jar on the ground
- The MayoStack 3000 is a tub of mayo
- Uses MayoStack 3000 to glue the mayo jar back together...?
- Gets annoyed and leaves
- Theo calls Popo & asks him to come to the bar
- Tells Popo the GHOST STORY
- Indigo is interested
- We look at a map of the asteroid in Keys, don't see anything about a mine
- Asks Indigo if Romi knows about the map data
- Didn't make the app, only consulted
- Romi comes over, points out the map was edited
- Volkas wants to buy anti-ghost stuff
- Gowena's eCommerce site is still up, she has a bunch of ghost-b-gone spray and shit up for sale
- Volkas buys all the stuff for 1500c
- Billy Naise is a partner of the resort, so ... his products are also sold in the shop
- Party w/ Bono K. Rono at 6 PM!
- Everybody is coming! (except H4NZ cuz he's all work & no play)
- Billy tries to buy Vorilynn shots, but she declines (the gardener, I think)
- Many CHIVES roll out and offer us all champagne flutes
- Security talks to Billy about harassing that lady, threatens to remove him
- Billy is escorted out of the party
- "Can I disguise myself? Using mayo?"
- Filip & Dr. Sidrani Loman head to the front of the room
- Addresses guests!
- Dr is in charge of spa & facilities
- Dr addresses guests
- Nothing exciting, just a "enjoy the stay blabla" speech
- Billy is covered in mayo
- Buzzblades address the guests!
- They offer US season tickets to their home games !!!
- Volkas accepts the gift on behalf of the Spainch Inquisition
- Shining blade of purple & white light (Zidhil's Blade)
- Weilded for 11 seasons, engraved w/ all their names
- Also gets armour with a jetpack (Lashunta Ringwear 3 w/ Jump Jets addon), used last season
- Also gets 2 fusion seals (Merciful Fusion Seal, Called Fusion Seal)
- Kane Zaphol scowls as we get rewarded
- "You shouldn't have interferred in official business!"
- "These people may praise you, sir, but what you did was foolish!"
- Chief of Security for New Elysium
- He's very mad that we did his job for him, crowd thinks he's a total asshole
- Some ysoki running around w/ a GoPro
- Theo talks to Dr. Sidrani
- Casually drops that he knows this place was a mine
- Sidrani did not know that! Thought it was a store of some sort.
- Reporter (or someone surveying guests for the resort?) talks to Volkas
- Asks question about the experience
- Yeah deffo a reporter
- Volkas mentions the ghosts
- Wants Volkas to lie about having SEEN a ghost
- Volkas doesn't want to jynx it tho
- Volkas' statements will be published to Kasathegram
- Billy tries to slip back in to the party
- Guards catch him
- Filip approaches Theo!
- Theo complains about Kane, Filip will write a report up
- Popo goes after Filip
- Popo: "can i touch your hand"
- Popo puts lotion on his hands.
- Billy sees and runs over to sell him mayo lotion
- Lotion is incredibly absorbant, Filip is impressed
- Billy tries to wear Popo as a mask to sneak back in
- NOPE.JPG
- Steinwergen wants to talk to Billy, is having trouble getting mayonette signups
- "Just be yourself!"
- Party concludes!
