Starfinder:Adventure Log/2019-05-24

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Doing It

  • Volkas has scheduled a shuttle to gtfo
    • Theo joins him to try and depart
    • Securiry guards blocking exit
    • Dr Lowman has quarentined the resort, some sort of disease
    • No updates on missing journalist
  • Billy Naise returns from docks, was in prison
    • Tries to sell the guards stuff
    • Creeps Theo and Volkas out
  • Billy gets a phone call
    • Invited to join Dr. Lomer and Virlae in the sun room
    • Pauses to harass Vorlynn, but CHIVES won't help this time
    • Billy bumps in to Theo & Volkas at elevators
    • Volkas gets a sample of mayo lotion on his arm.
      • Unblocks Billy to avoid future walk-by mayo-ings
  • Volkas & Theo visit the clinic
    • Sidrani looks exhausted
    • Stewards are coming
    • Doesn't know what the illness is, or what is causing it
    • Psychological thing, many guests are seeing visions & hearing voices, self-harm
  • Billy meets w/ Dr Lomer & Vilnae in sunroom
    • Gets naked at their suggestion
    • Virlae randomly gets offended for no reason and attacks Billy
    • Crawler starts filming it & egging Virlae on
      • "Look at my penis!" "Oh I'm filmin' it buddy, I'm filmin' it"
  • Billy returns to clinic for treatment
    • Theo senses mystical corruption in Billy
    • It is trying to hide its true nature
    • Buzzblades (Virlae & Lomer) have been affected, as well as Filip
  • Popo can't find Filip
  • Lomer is in the sunroom, Keys directs us there
    • Lomer complains of odd halucinations, like all her teeth falling out
    • Theo examines Lomer while Volkas & Popo ask her what she's been experiencing
      • As Lomer becomes more agitated by the interrogation, sense more and more dark energy welling up in her
      • Similar energy to Billy, but less intense
    • Popo attempts a dispell magic
    • Fails
  • We go to try a dispel on Billy
    • Billy is going to leave, Theo resignedly asks about MayoGlide MAXXX
    • Buys 1 cola-flavoured mayo for 15c
    • Dispel has no effect
  • H4NZ sees an ad for a new <??>
    • Ad plays, and then everything dissolves into Tofinkle
    • Mr. Happy appears and starts laughing insanely
    • AD ENDS.
    • H4NZ decides its a halucination, examines himself, is not diseased.
    • Notes guests are more agitated during activities, so it may be stress-induced
    • Syncs up w/ Theo on what they know, H4NZ joins investigation party
  • Spanish ad plays on Volkas' comm unit
    • Paco's Taco's ad (lol)
    • Seemed a bit /off/ to Volkas, it's supposed to be an ad for half off beans
    • But beans started EXPLODING and blood was oozing out of the cup
  • With a nat20 Lawyer roll, Theo determines Billy Naise is definitely up to some shady tax evasion shit
  • Detect Magic on Billy as he becomes more agitated w/ his sales pitch to Volkas
    • There is magic, but it's elusive & nothing can be determined
    • Volkas sprays Billy with ghost-b-gone
    • Detect Magic again does not show any change in the dark energy
  • Volkas spoogles "how to cure curses"
    • Finds article by some random Kasathan blogger mom
    • Talks a lot about her home remedy for cursee: Urine Therapy!
    • Bathe in your own piss after storing it for three days, mix it w/ lavendar and sage
    • Billy sprays Volkas w/ a mayo perfume
    • Popo thinks Volkas' piss idea may have merit
  • Billy breaks in to Bruce's workshop/lab/IT helpdesk room
    • Bruce is watching porn
    • Bruce throws cheese doodles at Billy
    • Billy wants to sell him mayo
    • Said he's filming everything
    • Bruce threatens to kill Billy if Billy shows anyone the tape
  • Popo asks Elysia where the urine is kept
    • Elysia is like "u wot m8"
    • Waste is held somewhere on the asteroid pending electrolization
    • Only security & janitorial personnel are authorized in the waste storage area
    • Janitorial duties belong to CHIVES
  • H4NZ suggests talking to a historian?
    • Volkas asks Keys if any historians are around
    • Sathisa the journalist knew some stuff, but is missing.
    • Speak w/ Kaines (the asshole) can show us footage of journalist
    • Theo calls him. Goes about as well as expected.
  • H4NZ suggests Crawler, the ysoki running around with a GoPro, may have some info about Sathisa
    • We hear weird noises from his room
    • We knock
    • LOTS of weird noises :?
    • Mayo all over
    • Asks if he may have footage of Sathisa that may help us find her !
    • Popo offers him more mayo in exchange for help
    • "About Sathisa..."
      • Was recording Bono K. Rono yelling at Filip at the time
    • Room is gross, "I'd say about a 6 on a scale of one to Junk"
    • Shows us the footage of Bono K. Rono
    • Has a Bono K. Rono pee tape
  • H4NZ spoogles curing curses
    • Finds lots of info about it
    • Identify & remove source of curse, then clean up leftover bad juju
    • It is very hard to identify a propertly-crafted curse.
    • Theo suggests building a ghost detector to help find the source of the curse
  • DAWN OF THE SEVENTH DAY.
    • Theo feels something weird in throat
    • MONSTEROUS EYE IN MY MOUTH OH GOD
    • Disappears when I open and close my mouth
  • We book a conference room to start building a ghost detector
    • We build a thing
    • Popo & Theo make a spell gem w/ a custom Detect Magic spell that's attuned to the dark energy
    • H4NZ makes a device that interfaces w/ the gem and dings/clicks as we get closer to the source of the energy
    • Takes the day to make !
  • Billy continues trying to harass Vorilynn, but she's locked in the groundskeeper hut
    • Billy convinces CHIVES to give her a box of mayo-filled chocolates
    • Billy leaves mayo right outside the door
    • Also a card apologizing
  • We turn on the ghost detector
    • Rainbow of colours and a bunch of clicks
    • Popo spins around the room
    • Colour gets more purple & clicking is louder when pointed towards shadows
  • Plan on how to use this new device
    • Wander around until the device tells us something useful
    • Should ask to explore the asteroid
      • If they say no, fuck them and explore it anyway
    • Spraying the ghost-b-gone doesn't get a reaction from the device
    • We do a walk-through in the guest quarters to see if anyone in particular gets a reation from the ghost detector
  • Billy is standing in front of Vorilynn's door, staring at it.
    • Saying creepy stalker shit
    • "I shall have you" -- ghost detector goes PITCH BLACK & then back to normal
    • Walk through guest quarters, no reactions from the device as strong as Billy's
  • Volkas talks about golarians and creating ghosts
    • H4NZ is feeding Volkas' bullshit, suggests factions of Golarians are in-fighting with ghosts to fuck with him
    • Volkas spoogles "evil golarians" and ends up on SpaceTube, insane conspiracy videos
    • Watches the "Golarian Hunters" TV show
    • Downloads eBook written by "Prof" that wrote the Ancient Golarians book -- Ancient Golarians: The True History (what the stewards dont want you to know)
  • Billy spent the night smearing mayo on Vorilynn's door.
    • Billy gives in to the darkness.
    • Billy's touch is freezing the mayo as he smears it.
    • His hands look dead and blue.
    • Billy draws runes and symbols in the mayo.
  • Theo wakes up in a cold sweat, panicking
    • Emotions drain away to numbness
    • DEADENED EMOTIONS
  • Volkas has a vision of a golarian ghost asking him to bang
    • Volkas realizes it wasn't real.

Homwork

  • Theo has deadened emotions, Billy has dead frozen hands.
  • DO SOME GHOST HUNTING.